How Do You Know if You're Saved?

 Our oldest granddaughter is a heart-warming combination of spunk, determination, tenderheartedness, and faith.  She is a gymnast, has unparalleled energy, and her considerable social acumen includes skills of keen observation. Last year, at age 8, she made her public declaration of faith in Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior and was baptized. I am her grammy, and I think she is amazing.  

As background to the rest of this story, I'll share (again) that I've been through a difficult life-interlude since my mom died of Alzheimer's 5 years ago. Mom passed following a 16 year journey through dementia. She died in January of 2020, just at the beginning of the pandemic.  I was shell-shocked from heavy-duty caregiving responsibilities during the last years of her life.  

During the same timeframe, our church went through some changes that resulted in teaching I find unscriptural. I no longer felt I could support them with my tithes or attendance.  I'd been a member of this church since I was 16, and my memories of worshiping there with my extended family became a part of the grief of loss of my mother.  I fell into what I now recognize was depression complicated by a number of physical ills.  I began worshiping online during the pandemic and, I didn't know quite how to proceed. It just seemed incredibly painful and awkward to me to begin attending our little community's church that is now more in line with my beliefs, after over 50 years of attending the "other church" across town. Trapped by a slow healing from the wounds of caregiving plus those numerous physical ills, I continued home worship even after the pandemic ended.  

Meantime, all 6 of our grandkids and their families began attending that other church, the one I felt God was leading me toward.  Medication for depression helped me, and last Sunday, I sat with my kids and grandkids at church, worshiping together for the first time in about 6 years.  It was incredibly sweet and good, and after a circuitous route I felt I'd arrived at a church home.   

Last Thursday I picked up our now nine-year-old granddaughter from school.  After a snack and one episode of Wild Kratts, she was demonstrating some gymnastics moves.  She performed a handstand and fell over with her legs resting on the bed behind her. Still hanging upside down with her hands on the floor she said, "Grammy, how do you know you are saved?"  

I thought there was a strong possibility this was a test for me; a 9-year-old sees things in black and white and this child's grandmother had been apparently remiss in church attendance.  Maybe she was concerned for my eternal salvation.  

Or, maybe she was concerned for herself.  I decided to answer the question from her perspective.  

I said, "Once you have told Jesus you are sorry for your sins, and that You want Him to come into your heart and to live for Him forever, it's a done deal. We are saved by believing in Him, and so long as you want Him even a little, with faith even as tiny as the tiniest of seeds, you are His. After that it depends on Him and not you. If you stray from Him, He will come after you. He will work in your circumstances to bring you back. Nothing can separate you from His love."  

I let that sink in for a few seconds.   

I added, "Grandma Ruth said, 'Sometimes I've let go of Him, but He never let go of me.'"  

"He will not let go of you. There is a Scripture that says, 'I've not lost one of those entrusted to Me.'  He will not lose you. Your baptism showed the world that you belong to Jesus and was a sign of obedience to Him.  You are safe and saved." 

After a pause I added, "And so am I."   

"After believing in Him and getting to know how very much God loves you, then you will want to serve Him.  It is God's love for us and our love in response to Him that makes us want to do what He wants us to do. Obeying is the way we  show our love and gratitude for Him.  But it isn't the good things we do that save us. It's believing. You've done that.  You are saved."  

"And so am I!"  

She flipped down out of her handstand and said, "Are there any more snacks?"  

And of course, since this is Grammy's house, there were.  

Abide in His Love

You are not to judge, not even yourself.  Do your best to obey.  Consult with the Lord, obey, pray some more and repeat.  God loves you.  You don’t get graded for today.  Jesus has earned an A+ and your report card bears His “grade.”  Love is your debt, love is your portion, love is your joy and strength.  God is yours and you belong to Him; this is your joy.  

 

“May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully.  Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God”  Eph. 3:19 NLT. 

Back in the Saddle Again....

 For a number of years, for a number of reasons, I've not attended church in person.  I've continued to worship via online services. 

The Lord has gently made me a way out of my former congregation where I had been a member for over 50 years. They have adopted principles and beliefs I find unscriptural, but even so, apart from the Lord's providence, I would have clung to the familiarity of the dear setting in which I once worshiped with my parents and extended family. 

First, my Alzheimer's mom's condition deteriorated and I was forced to place her into nursing home care after 12 years of at-home caregiving.  Mom was a difficult patient and I adopted the habit of attending the nursing home's services with her each Sunday morning.  

Then, Mom passed away in January of 2020, and by March of that year, we were sheltering at home because of Covid. I had side effects to the vaccine and was told that Covid itself might be dangerous for me.  And so I continued home worship.  

Then, my health deteriorated with one problem after another. I'd had fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue since my 20's, and these symptoms worsened. I was probably suffering depression in the wake of my Mom's passing, and then I suffered a nasty fall on ice that left me hobbling with a hip injury that took the better part of a year to heal.  

Deuteronomy 33 describes how the Lord ushered the Israelites to where they needed to be by stages.  I feel He has ushered me to the doorway of a new church gently and by stages these past years.  

Oddly, I have not felt one pang of guilt or any sense of failure or wrongdoing about worshiping at home, although I've sometimes fallen to fear of what other people think. Not, that is, until about two weeks ago when I suddenly felt the Holy Spirit's nudge saying, "It's almost time!"  

I was convicted by this quote from Matthew Henry:  “It is impossible to be sincere in the faith, sensible of the goodness of God, constrained by the love of Christ, sanctified by the power of the Holy Ghost, and yet be indifferent to the progress of religion, and the spiritual success of others, through love of ease, or fear of conflict. Let then your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” 

It has indeed been comfortable here at home, but this quote has provided me the impetus I need to face the discomfort of entering a new church in a different setting from the one in which I worshiped God in sweet fellowship with loved ones for so many years.  

The Lord is with me.  Soon I'll begin a new church attendance adventure.  Father go ahead of me and make my path straight, as I know You already have done.  Thank You for Your presence with me during all the stages of my life.