Here I Am

I’ve always found the words, “Here I am,” springing to my lips as soon as I come to the Lord in prayer each day. When we say, “Here I am, send me,” God puts us to work in the fields of His choice. For years I longed to be of “real” use to the Lord, but I have learned that the true spiritual life of discipline and growth takes place in the valleys of everyday life.

My ministries over the years have been teaching, parenting, and most recently caregiving. Many times I longed for an adrenalin rush of excitement and risk, for the emotional highs of proclaiming the Gospel to the lost, for the soaring compassion toward the heart rending pathos of the needy, and for the sense of being used for noble purposes in the Kingdom. I thrilled to a few mountaintop experiences in the Lord and longed to stay on the mountaintop. I was like a gymnast who loves competition but doesn’t understand that the daily drudge of preparation is 99% of the event. Without the preparation time in the valley, there can be no mountaintop. And though the thrill of exciting moments in the Lord is sweet, it is also very rare. Our spiritual and physical lives here on Earth consist mainly of valleys and of faith in things unseen. Walking through the valley while holding to the vision of usefulness we received on the mountaintop seems difficult and even impossible until we look at our Savior’s face. His eyes hold amusement, His arms enfold us in wonderful love; He says, “This is the way, walk in it,” and “Come unto Me.”

Apart from a daily refocusing upon the goodness of our Savior’s grace, upon the Father’s love and the Spirit’s guidance, it becomes a constant challenge to trust that the Lord has the big picture and that His love intends us good and not harm. Days, weeks, months, and years are just a drop in the eternal bucket of God’s wisdom and knowledge.

Father, let the compass of my heart point to You and You alone; not on service, not on ideas of how I may be of use in the Kingdom but upon Christ and Christ alone.

Scripture: Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" (Isaiah 6:8).