Beyond Our Ability to Endure

When we are nearly paralyzed by grief or pain, when all our strivings and struggles have ground to a halt beneath the weight of simply surviving the challenges of each new day, we can be encouraged by Paul's words in 1 Corinthians 8-11:

We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.  He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us again. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers.

This account tells us that even the Apostle Paul struggled under the weight of suffering so severe that he thought he might die of it!  The encouragement comes when we recognize that the God who delivered Paul is the same God who loves and will deliver us; we can share Paul's faith when he says "He has delivered us...and He will deliver us again."  

From Day 31 in my devotional, One Hundred Days to Freedom:

God has saved us through our belief in what Christ has done, and He looks at our hearts ahead of our actions. It is belief that fuels our trust in God, and trust is the necessary foundation of obedience to Him. Through Jesus Christ by the power of the Holy Spirit, the God of all creation inhabits the past, present and future. It is safe to place our trust in Him. 

When we feel pressured beyond our ability to endure, it is time rely fully on the Lord.

~~~

But as for me, I trust in You, O Lord;

I say, “You are my God.”

My times are in Your hand...

--Psalm 31:14-15

Note:  This post also appears today at my devotion blog: 100 Days to Freedom  

Restore, Renew, Revive

I can't see the outcome of the changes that are happening in my mother's life
and my own, but the Lord is with us, and the results of this time of change are in His hands.

 I've feared that my mother and I are so connected through bonds not only of love but also of her powerful need of me, that her death might cause a life-threatening rending in my heart.  I've caught glimpses that the Lord has caused my mom to remain here so long in order to give me time to bring these ties that have bound me to her into His light.  Severing those connections is not a surgery I can do for myself.  

This is embarrassing. What if those tiresome, only-child jokes about apron strings and being Mommy's little girl turn out to hold truth? But of much greater concern to me at this point, what if the severing of those ties finishes me off?  I've had a mind picture of my mother and me in separate vehicles, traveling side-by-side.  I've escorted her on her journey to a boundary I can't cross, and it is time for me to make a U-turn and head back to finish my own journey.  How do I make that turn?  

A few mornings ago I awoke with the terms "restore, renew, revive," in my mind.  I think that the Lord is telling me that when Mom passes away that I can trust Him to restore what has been lost, renew my zest for life, and revive me, even physically.  But I can't see past that seemingly final blow of my mother's passing.  It's like that uneasy moment when one restarts a computer and the screen goes blank.  Will it spring to life once more?  

The one sure promise to which I cling is that the Lord is with us.  He's promised never to leave or forsake us. Whether healing and restoration occurs on this side of the Jordan or after our crossing, He is there.  This fact of His promised presence brings peace.

“All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well.” 

--Julian of Norwich

I remain confident of this:

    I will see the goodness of the Lord

    in the land of the living.

Wait for the Lord;

    be strong and take heart

    and wait for the Lord.

--Psalm 27:13-14