Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Mom's Wallet

I've been cleaning Mom's apartment, preparing for its transformation from "Mom's room" to "family room." It is a bittersweet time as so many of you have experienced; sorting through old photos and possessions and making decisions about items to send to Goodwill is heartrending.

At the nursing home just recently. 
I opened Mom's top dresser drawer today and found her wallet.  When she came to live with us twelve years ago this month, I remember hesitating as I emptied her purse and billfold.  In a moment of wisdom that was surely from the Lord and not of me, I reassembled her wallet and included some money, her library card, a blood donor card, and other items that would not be missed if she threw them away or hid them.  I put the wallet in plain sight on her dresser, and whenever Mom asked if she had any money left, I was able to show her that familiar wallet.  Sometimes she wanted to hold it awhile, but usually she just handed it back to me, reassured.

It is important for dementia patients to retain as much of a sense of dignity and adulthood as possible.  Although Mom is past the need for such reassurance now, I am glad that as a fledgling caregiver I had the wits to preserve an appearance of independence for her during the time such things provided her comfort.

Mom has transitioned to nursing home care as well as can be expected. My heart tells me that we are traversing the final days of her journey through Alzheimer's. While I would much prefer to avoid this present sorrow, the sweetness of the Lord's presence and solace provides comfort that nourishes and strengthens.  Thank you for praying for us.


  1. Praying for you, Linda. My mother's wallet is very important to her too and she will occasionally ask for it so she can look at her ID cards etc. I also keep money in it so she feels independent. Prayers for you and your precious mom.

    1. Prayers are much appreciated, Melanie, you have mine.

  2. Cute picture of you both! Yes, it is true that dementia patients need to feel as if they have some contol. The Holy Spirit has been faithful to show you the way and you have been wise and willing to listen. It has provided your mom with the best possible experience. Ongoing prayers for all. (I do not envy you the clearing out. It is definitely a bittersweet experience.)