During my devotion time this morning I was apologizing to the Lord for feeling so depressed. I assumed I was exaggerating my sorrows and that the pain I feel over seeing Mom sagging in her wheelchair at the nursing home, for example, is not as severe a trial for her to endure or for me to observe as I perceive it to be. I tend to dismiss my tears or feel that I'm being silly if I give way to depression.
As I prayed, these thoughts came:
For the most part, we underestimate both the severity of the trials we face and their impact upon our minds and bodies. The one thing that needs attention is the weight of the burden we feel whenever we do catch a glimpse of how truly grievous our injuries have been. It isn't that we should dismiss the pain, but that we should commit it into God's hands, because our suffering belongs to Him. When we dismiss as inconsequential the grief we've endured, we risk inflicting further injury upon ourselves.
To commit heartache into the Lord's hands is like sending something that belongs to us to a place where it can be taken care of so we don't have to think about it anymore.
It isn't a simple transaction. My pain over my mother's suffering, among other things, feels as though it is my own, almost as though it is a possession that belongs tucked away in my heart. I must make a conscious choice to release my sorrows into the hands of the One who has offered to bear it on my behalf.
1 Peter 2:25 calls Jesus "the overseer of our souls." This is precious imagery that portrays Christ as being in charge of the welfare of our hearts. We don't cause Him more pain by releasing our suffering to Him; when we release our sorrows to Him we avail ourselves of His sacrifice already made at the Cross. In fact, a way we might increase our Savior's pain is to refuse to accept the payment He has given for us.
May we have grace to commit our sorrows into His hands.
“He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.” For “you were like sheep going astray,” but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.
1 Peter 2:24-25
One thing I have always been thankful for in the Psalms is the honest crying out to God in the midst of many sorrows and trials. I'm so glad we don't have to try to hide it or downplay it, but we can give it to Hm.
ReplyDeleteI have never thought of this particular angle. Thank you for mentioning it. I have had a rough January and have been very hard on myself for feeling sad...I may be Vitamin D deprived...anyway, thank you. I'll give it to Him and let Him deal with it. I once wrote about seeing my grandmother in her wheelchair all slumped and alone. It nearly tears one's heart out. Now I watch my father old and slumped in his chair, dozing nearly all the time...sigh. I am grateful that my darling husband missed that part of old age. Love to you...
ReplyDeleteIt's not wrong to feel sad. What I have to be cautious of is when my sorrow allows me to begin to tarnish the Lord's reputation in my mind. I have a tendency to turn away from Him when I'm hurting the most. Praise His Name, that He doesn't let go of us. Vee, I'm so sorrow for your greater sadness in the absence of your precious husband. Hurry spring and sunshine!
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