Friday, November 16, 2018

When We Lose Control

I was offended when, immediately following a surgery, I tried to explain to the nurse why I was weeping.  She said, "It's the loss of control."

She was probably right.  Drugged, in pain, wearing a hospital gown, my weight posted on a chart within direct line of my (and everyone else's) vision; yes, I had certainly lost control.

So many things about our lives force us to admit we are not in control. We can't control the course of a loved one's Alzheimer's, indeed, as Scripture says, we are so frail that we do not even know what will happen tomorrow!*

I'm currently awaiting results for a round of medical tests, and once more I've had to admit I'm not in control as I wait, and wait some more.  I've found a curious relief in this waiting place, the relief of a child who doesn't know what is going to happen but is unbothered, because she trusts her father's wisdom.  I trust the Lord.  I am grateful that He is with me in my waiting.  I do have moments of nervous fear but for the most part I am able to take a deep breath and rest in the knowledge of His love.

*James 4:14


  1. That was beautiful. We all do a great deal of waiting in this life and, speaking for myself, I am not very good with it. It is a wonderful thought that “He is in the waiting.”

    (Now, somebody’s hospital policies need a string review and a rebuke. I have never heard of such a set-up. 🥴)

    A blessed Thanksgiving to you and yours, Dear Heart.

    1. Vee, thank you so much! That weight posting was more upsetting to me than most of the other aspects of the stay! I suppose I should write a letter or something. :-) God bless you, and I pray a wonderful Thanksgiving for you as well.

    2. Hope you know what a “string” review is. Ha!

    3. I don't! And googling it didn't help! Is this something I need to be told by private message, LOL????

    4. It should have read “strong review” and I think “review” should have been rebuke. Sorry for the confusion. 🙃

    5. Too funny!!!!! I make so many typos myself I can usually read through them for meaning ... but this one escaped me! Hugs and prayers to you, my kind friend.