Friday, November 16, 2018

When We Lose Control


I was offended when, immediately following a surgery, I tried to explain to the nurse why I was weeping.  She said, "It's the loss of control."

She was probably right.  Drugged, in pain, wearing a hospital gown, my weight posted on a chart within direct line of my (and everyone else's) vision; yes, I had certainly lost control.

So many things about our lives force us to admit we are not in control. We can't control the course of a loved one's Alzheimer's, indeed, as Scripture says, we are so frail that we do not even know what will happen tomorrow!*

I'm currently awaiting results for a round of medical tests, and once more I've had to admit I'm not in control as I wait, and wait some more.  I've found a curious relief in this waiting place, the relief of a child who doesn't know what is going to happen but is unbothered, because she trusts her father's wisdom.  I trust the Lord.  I am grateful that He is with me in my waiting.  I do have moments of nervous fear but for the most part I am able to take a deep breath and rest in the knowledge of His love.

*James 4:14


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7 comments:

  1. VeeNovember 17, 2018 at 5:05 AM

    That was beautiful. We all do a great deal of waiting in this life and, speaking for myself, I am not very good with it. It is a wonderful thought that “He is in the waiting.”

    (Now, somebody’s hospital policies need a string review and a rebuke. I have never heard of such a set-up. 🥴)

    A blessed Thanksgiving to you and yours, Dear Heart.

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    Replies
    1. Linda BornNovember 17, 2018 at 6:46 AM

      Vee, thank you so much! That weight posting was more upsetting to me than most of the other aspects of the stay! I suppose I should write a letter or something. :-) God bless you, and I pray a wonderful Thanksgiving for you as well.

      Delete
    2. VeeNovember 17, 2018 at 12:47 PM

      Hope you know what a “string” review is. Ha!

      Delete
    3. Linda BornNovember 18, 2018 at 5:43 AM

      I don't! And googling it didn't help! Is this something I need to be told by private message, LOL????

      Delete
    4. VeeNovember 19, 2018 at 3:56 PM

      It should have read “strong review” and I think “review” should have been rebuke. Sorry for the confusion. 🙃

      Delete
    5. Linda BornNovember 19, 2018 at 4:30 PM

      Too funny!!!!! I make so many typos myself I can usually read through them for meaning ... but this one escaped me! Hugs and prayers to you, my kind friend.

      Delete
  2. Little Birdie BlessingsNovember 25, 2018 at 7:39 PM

    Praying for you dear Linda.

    ReplyDelete

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